Tango Till I'm Sore

I worked all evening on rearranging a Tom Waits song into a tango.  Kinda hard to do that crap with only a guitar.  I surprised myself. 

It makes me wish I still had a piano.  My mother sold it for $600 when she moved to California in the early 80s--losing that piano just killed me, therefore I wanted to kill her--probably best she left town for awhile. The last song I played on it was Bob Seger's "We've Got Tonight," (the piano movers stood there until I finished) then it got carried out the door immediately thereafter.  Meh.

As for my drug intake, I have totally weaned off the steroids.  Pain has returned in full force, so obviously the steroids were keeping it in check. My body feels like I've been in a knock-down-drag-out fight, or in a 20 round boxing match. The problem is, I can't maintain that high of a steroid dose for long - it does terrible things to me.  I called the pain doc today, and he increased the Gabapentin  to 1200mg/day.  It's the only choice I have besides advil and aspirin, so I'm taking it. I can't get a real GD pain pill to save my life. I will have to pay close attention and watch for any weird neuro symptoms. 

In the meantime, I'll play my guitar.  I'm treating it like a job - playing until my hands stop working, then resting and playing some more. My memory is total CRAP.  I have to read what I play, since I can't remember a damned thing.  It's excellent that a skillion leadsheets are available online for free.  You can find just about any song you want without too much difficulty.  Playing also keeps me occupied so I don't get stuck in the "perpetual worry loop," which I actually fear.

I live for the day when I can stop hurting and stop worrying.  Hopefully this guitar and my own brand of music therapy can help me do that.