Surprising how much faster days are flying by when I'm trying to get better and nothing is working. All it does is seem to amplify how much time I DON'T have. Like today I said to myself, "Holy crap, it's Friday."
I've been watching Animal Planet a lot. The news depresses me so much I can no longer watch it. Animal Planet is pretty depressing in its own right, with their plethora of mangy, dying dogs, cats trapped in sewers, and skeletal horses.
Maybe I should start watching nothing but cartoons with a sprinkling of comedy channel thrown in for good measure. I am attempting to find a craft or something I can do, but I just don't have the concentration or focus. I have a complete inability to *do* anything other than lay around and try to be as numb as possible.
My standards have lowered considerably. Instead of wanting them to fix me, now I just want the pain to stop. I hope somebody can do something soon - I can't stand much more.
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