Sunday, October 2, 2011

SPREE

Spent the afternoon at Macy's buying a metric butt-ton of clothing. My narrow ass has gotten even narrower and my skinny thighs even more twig-like *sigh.* Mr. Peanut would be envious of my thighs.  My legs only swell from the knee down for some reason, so lately I've had legs like Popeye.  So sexy.

I was physically unable to try anything on at the store, despite trying to ram everyone out of the way with my trusty rollator.  I need to put some chariot spike-blade things on the wheels.

I will try on tomorrow, keep the good stuff, and the rest will go back.  I have a huge problem with arm length and too-short sleeves.  I'm extra happy when I can find something with a rolled cuff, which I then just roll down, and it looks like normal.

Technically I'm a "tall" but tall women's clothing can rarely be found in stores.  Fortunately they are generally making inseams longer, which I think is due to everyone wearing high heels these days. For whatever reason, I can usually find a pair of pants that has a long enough inseam. Unfortunately the ass is always too baggy.  I have resigned myself to being doomed with "ass knobs." (It actually hurts to sit on a hard kitchen chair because of my bony ass--when I say "ass knobs," I MEAN "ass knobs!")

I also think I tried on every shoe close to my size in the store. I'm sensing a huge winter shoe problem on the horizon. I've been able to get by since May with flipflops because of swelling, but I can't wear flipflops all winter. Ugh.

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