I saw an Orthopedic Surgeon today about my hip. He and I had one of the most ridiculous conversations I've ever had with a health professional.
After reviewing the skillion Xrays from the ER that were taken yesterday, he says in his sing-song-Apu-of-the-Simpsons voice, "I see a collection of fluid. I don't see a crack in the knob but that doesn't mean there isn't one there. If we were to take an MRI today, I might would see a crack. We would also see that your knob is even more filled with fluid." Despite pretty intense pain, I am trying to not snicker.
He told me that even if it is bruised/injured and not an actual break, it will still take as long as an actual break to heal. He is saying it is more than likely a hairline fracture, and since there is no actual separation of bony parts, surgery or pinning is not needed, but I absolutely cannot fall on it again, especially while it's trying to heal.
He continues, "I fully expect your knob to be swollen for at least 6 weeks." He says this and the ONLY thing I can think of is, "But the TV says it's a medical emergency if my knob is swollen for more than 4 hours." -.-
So I have a pain drug assortment. (Dr. Whackadoo can go to Hell.) A really interesting thing about pain is that the brain picks out the most accute pain and kind of focuses your attention on that pain - making any other pains not seem so bad in comparison. My ribs still hurt like hell on the left, since I landed on them too, but I'm not really noticing any sternum pain or general chest wall pain unless I have to cough or something. The vein graft donation site seems to be virtually pain free at the moment--very interesting indeed, especially since that is the leg that both has to bear all the weight and has the swelling problem.
I'm supposed to stay off the injured knob leg as much as I can, which is easier said than done. You never realize how much you use an ass knob until you no longer have one to use. I can't sit on it. I can't lay on it. It's a stabby hideous pain if I put my foot on the floor and worse if it bears any weight...and worst of all, it is a direct ass knob hit on any toilet seat. *sigh* I'm kinda hopping/dragging/limping around on the old-style aluminum walker.
Incidentally, this doctor also told me today that yogis refer to the part I call "ass knobs" as "sit knobs." The part I'm talking about is the ball part of the ball and socket hip joint. It probably has a real name, but I can't seem to find it, and anyway, I much prefer the term "ass knob."
Monday, October 31, 2011
Sunday, October 30, 2011
OK DAMMIT - DECISION TIME
Difficult to walk/bear weight. Impossible to sit. Leg turning outward, and of course hurty, really really hurty. No bruising, but swelling. And my entire body hurts, not just my ass/hip. Ribs on that side are again a nightmare.
If at all possible I'm going to try to wait until my primary doc opens tomorrow to get an xray. That way I won't have to pay the huge ER co-pay from my shitty insurance co-pay rule.
If I HAVE to go to the ER at least I can drive, since this is on my left side and my driving leg still works. GAHHHHH.
If at all possible I'm going to try to wait until my primary doc opens tomorrow to get an xray. That way I won't have to pay the huge ER co-pay from my shitty insurance co-pay rule.
If I HAVE to go to the ER at least I can drive, since this is on my left side and my driving leg still works. GAHHHHH.
Saturday, October 29, 2011
OWW MY ASS KNOBS
I fell today. In my own bathroom. I had just bent down to plug the drain to the tub, attempted to stand back up, lost my balance and went over backwards. I landed on my left ass knob.
When I say "ass knobs" that's exactly what I mean. I have absolutely zero fat or muscle on my ass. All that's there is bone. So I guess an ass knob is actually a femoral head - the top of the thigh that fits into the hip socket. It hurts, but not an awful kind of hurt like I broke something. It feels about like a badly barked shin...throbby. So now I have the heating pad and advil to keep me company the rest of the night, but dammit to hell, like I needed another pain on top of what I already have. I expect to be extra sore all over tomorrow, but I think I'm ok. I should know by the morning if there's something bad wrong.
Shit. I have the worst luck in the world. If I had to fall down, why the hell couldn't it be at the mall or someplace else other than my own house? Hrmph.
When I say "ass knobs" that's exactly what I mean. I have absolutely zero fat or muscle on my ass. All that's there is bone. So I guess an ass knob is actually a femoral head - the top of the thigh that fits into the hip socket. It hurts, but not an awful kind of hurt like I broke something. It feels about like a badly barked shin...throbby. So now I have the heating pad and advil to keep me company the rest of the night, but dammit to hell, like I needed another pain on top of what I already have. I expect to be extra sore all over tomorrow, but I think I'm ok. I should know by the morning if there's something bad wrong.
Shit. I have the worst luck in the world. If I had to fall down, why the hell couldn't it be at the mall or someplace else other than my own house? Hrmph.
Friday, October 28, 2011
TACTICAL SHOOTING & OTHER LOST ARTS
Gee, another week without pain relief. Don't know if I'll make it to the zombie shoot or not this weekend. It would be fun, but I just feel like crap.
There's no Fn way I can put a shotgun on my shoulder for starters--I had planned to shoot from the hip. The fuckers there don't believe I can do it, claiming I'd just shoot the ceiling. After being laughed at, I had this urgent need to shove a headless zombie target up some range employee's ass, and truly planned to be there.
Btw, I can also shoot over my shoulder and under my arm. I just cannot wait until my friggin chest heals so I can go to that range and show various doofuses a thing or two. A few St. Louis friends have seen what I can do with firearms, so I'm not just blowing rainbows up any one's ass here, dammit!
Ha! O they of little faith! They should see what I can do with a whip. Not kidding. Indiana Jones wishes he had my mad whip skills! In fact, at one time I could probably have taken a whip to a gunfight and won. Also not kidding.
I have international witnesses for the whip skills. These are not just *tricks* I know, using a whip without actually killing someone or permanently maiming them in the process takes considerable skill, or just hitting a tiny target and nothing else, takes that same skill. It also takes considerable upper body strength to throw a long whip, or even a short one over a long period of time--strength I no longer have with a broken chest. Hell, I don't even have enough upper body strength to do a lot of leash work with the dog.
I don't know what's gonna happen to me. I miss the things I used to do. I miss the people I used to know. I feel helpless and useless, tired and broken. I hurt - this heart thing has hurt me more than anything else ever has. I'm not talking about just physical pain, of which there is plenty. It has hurt my entire being.
There's no Fn way I can put a shotgun on my shoulder for starters--I had planned to shoot from the hip. The fuckers there don't believe I can do it, claiming I'd just shoot the ceiling. After being laughed at, I had this urgent need to shove a headless zombie target up some range employee's ass, and truly planned to be there.
Btw, I can also shoot over my shoulder and under my arm. I just cannot wait until my friggin chest heals so I can go to that range and show various doofuses a thing or two. A few St. Louis friends have seen what I can do with firearms, so I'm not just blowing rainbows up any one's ass here, dammit!
Ha! O they of little faith! They should see what I can do with a whip. Not kidding. Indiana Jones wishes he had my mad whip skills! In fact, at one time I could probably have taken a whip to a gunfight and won. Also not kidding.
I have international witnesses for the whip skills. These are not just *tricks* I know, using a whip without actually killing someone or permanently maiming them in the process takes considerable skill, or just hitting a tiny target and nothing else, takes that same skill. It also takes considerable upper body strength to throw a long whip, or even a short one over a long period of time--strength I no longer have with a broken chest. Hell, I don't even have enough upper body strength to do a lot of leash work with the dog.
I don't know what's gonna happen to me. I miss the things I used to do. I miss the people I used to know. I feel helpless and useless, tired and broken. I hurt - this heart thing has hurt me more than anything else ever has. I'm not talking about just physical pain, of which there is plenty. It has hurt my entire being.
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Purple Boobs & a Pain in my Ass
I stopped taking Trileptal today, which was the epilepsy drug that was supposed to help nerve pain via Dr. Whackadoo, the pain specialist. It did nothing for my pain, but did provide me with a host of very unpleasant side effects. I am supposed to call them in a week after the drug has had a chance to clear my system, and then I guess he'll give me something else. Ya know, for a pain doctor he has done absolutely nothing to help my pain. Except give me a bigger pain -- IN MY ASS.
When I first started this whole heart business, I noticed on EVERY medical building there is a large decal that cannot be missed, right at eye height on the front door. "NO FIREARMS ALLOWED IN THIS BUILDING." This has happened since they modified the relatively recent concealed carry laws.
I can fully understand why these decals are there now, because I have met Dr. Whackadoo, and can easily see why some people might want to turn his face into hamburger meat.
BTW my screamy boobs really hurt, dammit. I'm calling the boob people tomorrow morning, since I just can't wait any longer for results without having a brain stem injury first.
When I first started this whole heart business, I noticed on EVERY medical building there is a large decal that cannot be missed, right at eye height on the front door. "NO FIREARMS ALLOWED IN THIS BUILDING." This has happened since they modified the relatively recent concealed carry laws.
I can fully understand why these decals are there now, because I have met Dr. Whackadoo, and can easily see why some people might want to turn his face into hamburger meat.
BTW my screamy boobs really hurt, dammit. I'm calling the boob people tomorrow morning, since I just can't wait any longer for results without having a brain stem injury first.
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Monday, October 24, 2011
Piss & Vinegar
It just dawned on me today that I spend a lot of time being scared lately. Like terrified scared. Of course since I found out I had a shitty heart my whole friggin world has been turned upside down. Now I find out I'll probably be losing my insurance, or at least the *good* insurance. I'll still have medicare, which totally sucks on its own and gets you practically nothing.
Tomorrow I have a date with a CT machine for my screamy hurty boobs. Honestly they feel like two big old achy teeth that are badly in need of root canals. I still find bras to be nothing but implements of torture. I can barely stand to move my arms or put on a damned shirt.
WTF is gonna happen to me with no insurance? I take 15 different drugs a day, and apparently there's something wrong with my boobs that has yet to be addressed. How the hell am I supposed to buy drugs? Especially the stupid cholesterol drugs that cost a skillion dollars each? How am I supposed to fix my screamy boobs?
Dammit, I knew I should have moved to Canada about twenty years ago when I used to be full of piss and vinegar. Now I'm just full of piss.
Tomorrow I have a date with a CT machine for my screamy hurty boobs. Honestly they feel like two big old achy teeth that are badly in need of root canals. I still find bras to be nothing but implements of torture. I can barely stand to move my arms or put on a damned shirt.
WTF is gonna happen to me with no insurance? I take 15 different drugs a day, and apparently there's something wrong with my boobs that has yet to be addressed. How the hell am I supposed to buy drugs? Especially the stupid cholesterol drugs that cost a skillion dollars each? How am I supposed to fix my screamy boobs?
Dammit, I knew I should have moved to Canada about twenty years ago when I used to be full of piss and vinegar. Now I'm just full of piss.
Friday, October 21, 2011
BRAND NEW NOSES and a BITCH
This is the time of year when I usually replenish my clown nose supply, since they are readily available at any pop-up Halloween store in town. Besides the standard clown nose size, which is 2 inches, they had a GIANT clown nose, which of course I had to buy.
I bought every clown nose they had in the store. I go through them like Pez. I give them away, I leave them laying somewhere. I leave them with tips, etc. Sometimes in rush hour traffic, I drive while wearing one. They're kind of my calling card, particularly since I started driving a clown car, a Honda Fit. Not as small as a Smart car, but pretty damned small. Especially when you consider that I am an Amazon-sized woman and sort of have to fold and unfold myself to get in and out. (Remember, 6'3" in my ass-stomping boots.)
So now I have this wild gray hair which is a natural fright wig thanks to my grinch heart - kind of like Beethoven's hair. My lovely red, sleek hair has been replaced by wiry white and steel gray, which I actually kind of like. Nonetheless it is still quite shocking to me, especially if I catch my reflection in a passing mirror or window, and it probably shocks other people as well. Meh.
I take my basket of nothing but clown noses up to the cashier, who is a muffin-topped 17ish year old girl with glitter makeup and feather extensions. For some reason I have a huge wad of $1 bills in my purse--43 of them to be exact. I have no idea how they got there, they just accumulate. I pull out my wad of ones and start counting them out one by one for the girl, and I say offhandedly while counting, "Ya know, I earned all these ones by dancing!"
She curls up her lip in a sneer of disgust, flaring nostrils, the whole nine yards. I pin back my ears in response and say flatly, "I'm teasing." "Oh. Ha ha." I totally wasted my humor on the only halfwit in the store. Gahhhhhh.
I bought every clown nose they had in the store. I go through them like Pez. I give them away, I leave them laying somewhere. I leave them with tips, etc. Sometimes in rush hour traffic, I drive while wearing one. They're kind of my calling card, particularly since I started driving a clown car, a Honda Fit. Not as small as a Smart car, but pretty damned small. Especially when you consider that I am an Amazon-sized woman and sort of have to fold and unfold myself to get in and out. (Remember, 6'3" in my ass-stomping boots.)
So now I have this wild gray hair which is a natural fright wig thanks to my grinch heart - kind of like Beethoven's hair. My lovely red, sleek hair has been replaced by wiry white and steel gray, which I actually kind of like. Nonetheless it is still quite shocking to me, especially if I catch my reflection in a passing mirror or window, and it probably shocks other people as well. Meh.
I take my basket of nothing but clown noses up to the cashier, who is a muffin-topped 17ish year old girl with glitter makeup and feather extensions. For some reason I have a huge wad of $1 bills in my purse--43 of them to be exact. I have no idea how they got there, they just accumulate. I pull out my wad of ones and start counting them out one by one for the girl, and I say offhandedly while counting, "Ya know, I earned all these ones by dancing!"
She curls up her lip in a sneer of disgust, flaring nostrils, the whole nine yards. I pin back my ears in response and say flatly, "I'm teasing." "Oh. Ha ha." I totally wasted my humor on the only halfwit in the store. Gahhhhhh.
Thursday, October 20, 2011
I AM THE BOSS OF YOU
For various reasons, my medical case is being reviewed by Best Doctors, Inc., based out of Boston. In order to do this, they must collect my medical records from every doctor, clinic or hospital I've visited over the past several years. The staff of these offices are of course uncooperative to begin with, seeing that it's extra work, but generally go ahead and send whatever they are bidden. A good review from Best Doctors is actually a big deal for them, as results are published country-wide. All except for one, Dr. No-Fly List, and his neurology staff.
This started yesterday afternoon when the RN who is overseeing my case called me and said she could get absolutely nowhere from Dr. No-Fly List's staff. They insisted they had no films of any MRIs I had there, that I had never had an MRI there, and I should call the hospital where I had had the MRI and jump on them.
As it happens I had two sets of MRIs done at their office. Yes, Dr. No-Fly List has his very own MRI machine! I tell the nurse, "Don't worry about it, I'll get it for you, and call you if I can't...but trust me, I'm like a bulldog when it comes to stuff like this." "OOO I knew you would be! Isn't it funny how you can tell about peoples' personalities just by talking to them a few times on the phone?"
After spending at least an hour on the phone talking to several neurology personnel, and being on hold for at least 45 of those minutes, I say to myself, "This is such bullshit," hang up the phone, get in my car and drive down to their office.
"OMG Miss Lee, what are you doing here?" "You know why I'm here. I'll be staying here until I have a CD in my hand containing all my information. Do you understand?" "Yes, Ma'am." "That includes the films or CD images of the MRIs, the reports, and any other pertinent information related to my case. Do you understand?" "Yes, Ma'am." I had a CD in my hot little paw within 10 minutes. Ahh Good times. I wasn't even wearing leather. I was in a zombie tee shirt fer cryinoutloud! Meh. When you have *it* I guess it doesn't matter what you're wearing, but sometimes it DOES help.
I really wish I could sit in a chair for 10 hours a day, since it's apparent they need an office manager and I would be SO perfect for the job. *eyeroll*
This started yesterday afternoon when the RN who is overseeing my case called me and said she could get absolutely nowhere from Dr. No-Fly List's staff. They insisted they had no films of any MRIs I had there, that I had never had an MRI there, and I should call the hospital where I had had the MRI and jump on them.
As it happens I had two sets of MRIs done at their office. Yes, Dr. No-Fly List has his very own MRI machine! I tell the nurse, "Don't worry about it, I'll get it for you, and call you if I can't...but trust me, I'm like a bulldog when it comes to stuff like this." "OOO I knew you would be! Isn't it funny how you can tell about peoples' personalities just by talking to them a few times on the phone?"
After spending at least an hour on the phone talking to several neurology personnel, and being on hold for at least 45 of those minutes, I say to myself, "This is such bullshit," hang up the phone, get in my car and drive down to their office.
"OMG Miss Lee, what are you doing here?" "You know why I'm here. I'll be staying here until I have a CD in my hand containing all my information. Do you understand?" "Yes, Ma'am." "That includes the films or CD images of the MRIs, the reports, and any other pertinent information related to my case. Do you understand?" "Yes, Ma'am." I had a CD in my hot little paw within 10 minutes. Ahh Good times. I wasn't even wearing leather. I was in a zombie tee shirt fer cryinoutloud! Meh. When you have *it* I guess it doesn't matter what you're wearing, but sometimes it DOES help.
I really wish I could sit in a chair for 10 hours a day, since it's apparent they need an office manager and I would be SO perfect for the job. *eyeroll*
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
I Demand Non-Smelly
This cold is kicking my ass despite the huge handful of prednisone I'm taking every morning. This weekend I did manage to get a lot done, however...in the manner of do something for 5 minutes, then sit down, get up in awhile and do something for 5 more minutes. I did this while "The Walking Dead" marathon was on.
The great room, at least, no longer looks like a crazy person lives here. It is now relatively hairless. The counter tops and desk are clutter-free. All the dog related stuff is now in its own milk crate that lives on top of Rue's cage.
I still have a shit-ton of mail to go through - which is now in a cardboard moving carton. If you'll remember I stopped opening bills when I got to the $125k mark. Too much stress. It is STILL too much stress, but I probably shouldn't just leave an entire cardboard carton of mail lay on my kitchen table.
I still have the mantle to tackle, which the tv is over....it's one of those big-ass corner fireplaces, so it has all the tv related crap on it, plus its own computer, so I can use the tv as a monitor and play blu-rays. There are books and tools and a keyboard, the stupid dvr thing, more books, and a lot of tiny little shit that I didnt want to get lost, so was put there in the hope of not getting lost, EVERY piece of which is a friggin dust magnet.
I bought a new box of swiffer duster refills. They now contain fabreeze. Why is it everything we buy these days has to be smelly? It annoys me. What if I don't want smelly? Why can't I just buy a plain non-smelly dustrag, fer cryinoutloud?
The great room, at least, no longer looks like a crazy person lives here. It is now relatively hairless. The counter tops and desk are clutter-free. All the dog related stuff is now in its own milk crate that lives on top of Rue's cage.
I still have a shit-ton of mail to go through - which is now in a cardboard moving carton. If you'll remember I stopped opening bills when I got to the $125k mark. Too much stress. It is STILL too much stress, but I probably shouldn't just leave an entire cardboard carton of mail lay on my kitchen table.
I still have the mantle to tackle, which the tv is over....it's one of those big-ass corner fireplaces, so it has all the tv related crap on it, plus its own computer, so I can use the tv as a monitor and play blu-rays. There are books and tools and a keyboard, the stupid dvr thing, more books, and a lot of tiny little shit that I didnt want to get lost, so was put there in the hope of not getting lost, EVERY piece of which is a friggin dust magnet.
I bought a new box of swiffer duster refills. They now contain fabreeze. Why is it everything we buy these days has to be smelly? It annoys me. What if I don't want smelly? Why can't I just buy a plain non-smelly dustrag, fer cryinoutloud?
Saturday, October 15, 2011
Friday, October 14, 2011
BRAAAIIIIIIINS
Halloween weekend there is a zombie shoot at the local indoor shooting range. Teams. I asked them what would happen if I came dressed as a zombie. They advised me not to do that.
I definitely cannot shoot with a shotgun on my shoulder. Not with an open chest....geezo I can imagine the pain and probable injury it would cause. However, taking out zombies from the hip is a distinct possibility. I may just go to watch, since I'm tired of staying home. Not to mention zombie killers are *my people.*
While shooting there you can choke on the burger grease permanently saturating the air. (I could feel my arteries quivering as soon as I walked over to the grill side, which is also the shotgun side).
I'm sure there will be lame prizes, but probably not meat. For some reason meat shoots are reserved for VFWs & Elks. Whatever. What's a headless zombie worth anyway? Free hour at the range? Box of shells? Ahh good times.
I definitely cannot shoot with a shotgun on my shoulder. Not with an open chest....geezo I can imagine the pain and probable injury it would cause. However, taking out zombies from the hip is a distinct possibility. I may just go to watch, since I'm tired of staying home. Not to mention zombie killers are *my people.*
While shooting there you can choke on the burger grease permanently saturating the air. (I could feel my arteries quivering as soon as I walked over to the grill side, which is also the shotgun side).
I'm sure there will be lame prizes, but probably not meat. For some reason meat shoots are reserved for VFWs & Elks. Whatever. What's a headless zombie worth anyway? Free hour at the range? Box of shells? Ahh good times.
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
SNARRRFFFKKKK UGH
Oh no, dammit I'm getting sick. Cold, flu, virus, whatever kind of zorch that's going around--I've got it. I was supposed to go to the neurologist tomorrow. Not gonna make it. In fact, probably won't make it out of bed, other than to feed and let out dogs.
This is the first sickness type thing I've had since finding out I had a tiny little broken grinch heart. I'm a little worried. I DID get a flu shot on 9/30 so lets hope the vaccine has had enough time to work and it's not flu, since there is at least one confirmed case in the area. After all the heart-related suffering, I'll be really pissed if flu kills me.
This is the first sickness type thing I've had since finding out I had a tiny little broken grinch heart. I'm a little worried. I DID get a flu shot on 9/30 so lets hope the vaccine has had enough time to work and it's not flu, since there is at least one confirmed case in the area. After all the heart-related suffering, I'll be really pissed if flu kills me.
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
WHACKADOO
Ok, today I had my second appointment with Dr. Whackadoo, the pain specialist, who is an actual mad scientist, if ever I saw one. The moniker I've given him is no accident.
This time I actually got a script he CLAIMS will help with nerve pain. It happens to be a drug for seizures/epilepsy. Oh goody. What the hell, if it can get rid of the burny tingly screamy, I'll play along. I'll try anything once, as long as it doesn't kill me with the first dose, I guess I'll be ok.
I wonder what happened to the nerve block everyone kept mentioning at the beginning. I know my memory is total shit since I was on the pump, but I DO remember several conversations concerning a nerve block. If this new drug does nothing for me, I believe I'll go pain doctor shopping on my own.
I actually had a mad Russian pain doc over in Jonesboro who did wonders for me when I had 3 bulging disks and couldn't walk upright. Fixed me right up he did, in a matter of only three weeks and 3 sets of facet blocks. I wanted to avoid surgery at any cost, and of course that's the FIRST thing a neurosurgeon wants to do to a bad back. I haven't had any back problems since (knock wood). As I am a former patient of the mad Russian, he'd probably take me back. Gee, now that I think of it that was like 8 years ago. Probably his thick Russian accent has been replaced with the Arky twang/drawl by now.
Supposedly Dr. Whackadoo was named one of the top docs in the state of LA with a practice in Metarie. If that is so, what the hell is he doing here? Did he land here after Katrina and decide to stay? I think I'll do a little probing. I can't believe the people in Memphis are any hurtier than the people in Nawlins. Hrmph.
This time I actually got a script he CLAIMS will help with nerve pain. It happens to be a drug for seizures/epilepsy. Oh goody. What the hell, if it can get rid of the burny tingly screamy, I'll play along. I'll try anything once, as long as it doesn't kill me with the first dose, I guess I'll be ok.
I wonder what happened to the nerve block everyone kept mentioning at the beginning. I know my memory is total shit since I was on the pump, but I DO remember several conversations concerning a nerve block. If this new drug does nothing for me, I believe I'll go pain doctor shopping on my own.
I actually had a mad Russian pain doc over in Jonesboro who did wonders for me when I had 3 bulging disks and couldn't walk upright. Fixed me right up he did, in a matter of only three weeks and 3 sets of facet blocks. I wanted to avoid surgery at any cost, and of course that's the FIRST thing a neurosurgeon wants to do to a bad back. I haven't had any back problems since (knock wood). As I am a former patient of the mad Russian, he'd probably take me back. Gee, now that I think of it that was like 8 years ago. Probably his thick Russian accent has been replaced with the Arky twang/drawl by now.
Supposedly Dr. Whackadoo was named one of the top docs in the state of LA with a practice in Metarie. If that is so, what the hell is he doing here? Did he land here after Katrina and decide to stay? I think I'll do a little probing. I can't believe the people in Memphis are any hurtier than the people in Nawlins. Hrmph.
Monday, October 10, 2011
TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY!
Holy crap, I made it another year -- and what a year it was. I am now officially fossilized. So I went to Sam's and bought myself this:
I specifically requested "I Need Cake Dammit" but there wasn't room. Pffft. She didn't try hard enough. I should have made her do it again on another cake! Of course, everyone who passed my grocery cart complimented the cake. Perfect.
I intend to eat a small slice. Ok, maybe I intend to eat two small slices. Then I thought I'd take it to the neighbor. If they don't want it it MUST go into the trash because I refuse to kill myself with a friggin cake, no matter how delicious the damned thing is.
I intend to eat a small slice. Ok, maybe I intend to eat two small slices. Then I thought I'd take it to the neighbor. If they don't want it it MUST go into the trash because I refuse to kill myself with a friggin cake, no matter how delicious the damned thing is.
Sunday, October 9, 2011
7 Red Hairs
So this is my hair in the sunlight. I think I have 7 actual red hairs left. Ignore the rest of the pic just look at the hair lol. So far the gray hairs have gotten me the senior discount at Sally's Beauty Supply. I'm workin' it, dammit!
Saturday, October 8, 2011
Goodbye Shoe Collection
As much as it pained me to do so, I gave the Veterans the majority of my shoe collection -- beautiful shoes and boots, gently worn and lovingly cared for, still in their original boxes, many pairs of heels, including one pair of never-worn red leather Italian knee-high four inch heeled boots. I will never be able to wear them again, why not free up a bunch of closet space? I tell ya, it was like a knife in my heart.
I kept the ass-stomping boots which were made specifically for me, and the *sensible shoes* but everything else is out the door - anything with an obscene heel on it, or anything deemed a "cruel shoe" -- like a fetishy type thing.
If I need a dress shoe for a specific reason, I'll just have to go buy something dressy yet sensible (yeah, like that combination would happen in a million years). Dammit, I am officially the owner of nothing but matronly shoes. ::stabs self::
I kept the ass-stomping boots which were made specifically for me, and the *sensible shoes* but everything else is out the door - anything with an obscene heel on it, or anything deemed a "cruel shoe" -- like a fetishy type thing.
If I need a dress shoe for a specific reason, I'll just have to go buy something dressy yet sensible (yeah, like that combination would happen in a million years). Dammit, I am officially the owner of nothing but matronly shoes. ::stabs self::
Friday, October 7, 2011
MMA
Wow tomorrow night there's an MMA title fight here. I turned it down - I'm not in fighting condition yet LOL.
Seriously, I doubt if I could even sit on a folding chair for more than 15 minutes let alone even walk to the ring, and I damned sure don't want anyone to bleed on me. Plus, I have never been to a fight where some altercation didn't happen outside of the ring, and sure as shit I'd be in the thick of it - just my lot in life to be "in the thick of things." I'm staying my ass home.
Seriously, I doubt if I could even sit on a folding chair for more than 15 minutes let alone even walk to the ring, and I damned sure don't want anyone to bleed on me. Plus, I have never been to a fight where some altercation didn't happen outside of the ring, and sure as shit I'd be in the thick of it - just my lot in life to be "in the thick of things." I'm staying my ass home.
Thursday, October 6, 2011
FFS
I just got *rapist scratches* from my dog, Rue, who was so apparently excited to see me after having been gone all day, decided to claw the shit out of me instead... I have three huge claw marks that go from the bottom of my ear, across my neck, and actually JOIN to my heart scar at mid-chest. GAHHHHH. So attractive So very hurty. Need to recover. Too damned bad I can't have a drink. Oh wait, I have Percocet. ::looks sideways at no one in particular::
Hmm...interesting that the pic doesn't look nearly as bad as it does in person (cause I have those shitty squiggly light bulbs). I'm tellin' ya if I was a man I would automatically be a suspect for something heinous.
Hmm...interesting that the pic doesn't look nearly as bad as it does in person (cause I have those shitty squiggly light bulbs). I'm tellin' ya if I was a man I would automatically be a suspect for something heinous.
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Grrrr
First of all, stupid router is sporadic. Need a new one. Need cash first. Sometimes it comes on and is cooperative. Other times it needs to be reset, only to go right back out. That big red "X" infuriates me.
Secondly, Dr. No-Fly-List postponed my appointment until the 13th. *sigh* At least the 13th is not on a Friday. I actually do *feel* better on prednisone, but am not really better, if that makes any sense. It has hideous side effects, so I both love and hate the drug. It's like a magic pill - as soon as it's stopped the symptoms it was helping come back worse than ever. It is like an item in the Steven King store, Needful Things.
What I'm really holding out for is the appointment with Dr. Whackadoo on the 11th. I have been hoarding pain pills since the last visit with the cardiologist, so I have at least one to take at bedtimes in the hope that I can at least get *some* uninterrupted sleep. SO so so very tired of hurting and not having a full range of movement, and a whole frigging xmas list of other things related to pain of which exhausts me just to think about.
Secondly, Dr. No-Fly-List postponed my appointment until the 13th. *sigh* At least the 13th is not on a Friday. I actually do *feel* better on prednisone, but am not really better, if that makes any sense. It has hideous side effects, so I both love and hate the drug. It's like a magic pill - as soon as it's stopped the symptoms it was helping come back worse than ever. It is like an item in the Steven King store, Needful Things.
What I'm really holding out for is the appointment with Dr. Whackadoo on the 11th. I have been hoarding pain pills since the last visit with the cardiologist, so I have at least one to take at bedtimes in the hope that I can at least get *some* uninterrupted sleep. SO so so very tired of hurting and not having a full range of movement, and a whole frigging xmas list of other things related to pain of which exhausts me just to think about.
Monday, October 3, 2011
Sunday, October 2, 2011
SPREE
Spent the afternoon at Macy's buying a metric butt-ton of clothing. My narrow ass has gotten even narrower and my skinny thighs even more twig-like *sigh.* Mr. Peanut would be envious of my thighs. My legs only swell from the knee down for some reason, so lately I've had legs like Popeye. So sexy.
I was physically unable to try anything on at the store, despite trying to ram everyone out of the way with my trusty rollator. I need to put some chariot spike-blade things on the wheels.
I will try on tomorrow, keep the good stuff, and the rest will go back. I have a huge problem with arm length and too-short sleeves. I'm extra happy when I can find something with a rolled cuff, which I then just roll down, and it looks like normal.
Technically I'm a "tall" but tall women's clothing can rarely be found in stores. Fortunately they are generally making inseams longer, which I think is due to everyone wearing high heels these days. For whatever reason, I can usually find a pair of pants that has a long enough inseam. Unfortunately the ass is always too baggy. I have resigned myself to being doomed with "ass knobs." (It actually hurts to sit on a hard kitchen chair because of my bony ass--when I say "ass knobs," I MEAN "ass knobs!")
I also think I tried on every shoe close to my size in the store. I'm sensing a huge winter shoe problem on the horizon. I've been able to get by since May with flipflops because of swelling, but I can't wear flipflops all winter. Ugh.
I was physically unable to try anything on at the store, despite trying to ram everyone out of the way with my trusty rollator. I need to put some chariot spike-blade things on the wheels.
I will try on tomorrow, keep the good stuff, and the rest will go back. I have a huge problem with arm length and too-short sleeves. I'm extra happy when I can find something with a rolled cuff, which I then just roll down, and it looks like normal.
Technically I'm a "tall" but tall women's clothing can rarely be found in stores. Fortunately they are generally making inseams longer, which I think is due to everyone wearing high heels these days. For whatever reason, I can usually find a pair of pants that has a long enough inseam. Unfortunately the ass is always too baggy. I have resigned myself to being doomed with "ass knobs." (It actually hurts to sit on a hard kitchen chair because of my bony ass--when I say "ass knobs," I MEAN "ass knobs!")
I also think I tried on every shoe close to my size in the store. I'm sensing a huge winter shoe problem on the horizon. I've been able to get by since May with flipflops because of swelling, but I can't wear flipflops all winter. Ugh.
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